2016.

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Where to begin?

 

I am aware that this year is not yet over, although I feel that I am now truly able to take a good look at what this year has brought and reflect on the journey I have tread.

 

I tend to be the type of individual who struggles to function within environments which do not fully contribute towards my needs of the moment. This has been the greatest challenge for me for most of my life, as the environments we often find ourselves in aren’t always under our direct control.

 

This may have been the most difficult thing for me to overcome over specifically the past 3 years – hopefully, my lack of detail does not disappoint you.

 

Although, as the year began, I was so lucky to have been able to move in with a dear friend of mine, whom I have known for nearly a decade. This was the beginning of my journey towards a positive and balanced life. Being surrounded by people who truly have your best interest at heart is something I cannot accurately describe – the growth it allows you is simply amazing.

 

So here I was, moving out of a state of emotional chaos which had kept me feeling utterly paralysed, to a serene space, oozing with positivity. Overnight I became one of those girls who would roll out of bed, stroll into the kitchen, pop the kettle on and shortly after, sit with her mug of steaming hot tea, and admire the awakening sky.

 

Lesson 1: Your environment is EVERYTHING.

 

Within this new space I could decide exactly how I wanted things to be, my schedule for the week, my meals, who I invited over – everything. My new independence chucked me into a deep pool of water and I instantly became a world-class swimmer. What this helped me to realise, besides the fact that a good environment is freaken great, was that I truly was in control of much more in my life than I had previously thought. It’s crazy what a little space and time away from certain people can do for you. I just clicked.

 

From that aha moment onwards, each day felt like a blank canvas I could slap a bunch of pretty colours onto, or not, but the choice was mine.

 

With this new understanding and excitement for life, I started realising who I wanted to be. If I was able to write my story, I’d for darn sure want a killer lead character. One could say I started reinventing myself into exactly who I wanted to be.

 

Lesson 2: Be the best version of yourself, not a second best version of someone else.

 

Unfortunately, my new found freedom was not all dandy business. With it came a false sense of invincibility, a cockiness and a wicked drive to create the perfect version of myself which I believed would fit perfectly into the crowd I so longed to be a part of.

 

This is where things got a little ugly…

 

For many of us, finding ourselves isn’t easy. I have always known my core, although I have not always been confident enough to let it shine. I spent years of my life being the second best versions of friends whom I idealised – although all this afforded me was being left in the background, a dull backdrop to their journeys.

 

It took this year, in my own space, with the constant encouragement of those few true friends and my flat-mate, for me to realise something of critical importance.

 

Perfection is not fun.

 

Once I started understanding how much easier it was to just be myself, quirks and all, I realised how much fun life could really be. I found myself having the same confidence I started my year off having, knowing that my life was mine to create, although now with the added excitement of not having to recreate myself, but to simply be myself.

 

And then, it happened… Life. Started. Falling. Into. My. Lap.

 

By life I mean: Friendships, determining what I truly wanted out of life, my goals being achieved, dreams becoming real – It was unbelievable.

 

2016 afforded me the most incredible journey, one I hope has inspired one or two of you reading this. A journey of self-discovery, learning to accept and let go of those things which no longer bring me happiness, and new friendships I could never have dreamed of.

 

So there it is. Two life lessons, two little life lessons that will completely, change your life.

 

All that is left to ask yourself is –

What are you waiting for?

 

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2 thoughts on “2016.

  1. so well written my bestie, I am so so proud of you! finally doing something I can see you enjoy & you are so so good at it! never stop dreaming – love you millions and miss you every day!

    love Eri Xx

    Like

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